So let me tell you what happened to me a couple of nights ago. I booked a CAREEM to take me home from work. I work at the theatre so some nights it is a bit late and I would quite like to get home quickly. Which is why I book CAREEM rather than wait for an RTA taxi. Please note the use of the word wait.
I book my CAREEM. The map tells me he is two minutes away. I foolishly think that fate and the gods are smiling on me. I pack up and go outside to meet the cab. No cab. I look at the map and I see that the taxi driver is haring off in the opposite direction. “No problem” I think. It is not inconceivable that he had to get back on the highway (if I had misread the map) and travel away from me to get back to me. I then watch him drive passed three potential off ramps to get back to me. So I call him, because I think there may be a problem with the pin I sent. The driver assures me, he has the correct pin he is "on his way". "HUMMMM." I say “No, you are not. You are traveling in the opposite direction and are now 20 minutes away from me.” He say “No problem Madame” my blood is now at full roiling boil. When people say no problem that is not usually what they mean and I do not like being called madame. Not that he was to know. I am trying to hold on to my temper. I kick off with how it is not okay that he is going in the wrong direction and missing turn around spots on the road. He gives me some cock and bull story that does not makes even the remotest sense and my head is pounding and I just want to go home so I tell him to get off at the next exit and come back down Sheikh Zayed Road TO ME. He says “Yes, Yes I am coming- no problem.” GRNNNN.
Remember I am developing a bit of a cold, not that I realize this at this stage I just know that I have watched three RTA taxis drive past and my cab is now over 25 minutes and counting away and I just want to get home. At this point you are probably wondering why I don’t cancel the cab. Do you know how complicated it is to cancel a CAREEM without incurring a cancellation fee? Do you? Try it. Also I am a bit sensitive about complaining about poor service from any taxi drivers because the consequences to the drivers are big , usually in terms of fines from their employers. Not sure if this applies to CAREEM but it does to RTA and honestly I am not trying to make a person with a pretty shitty life have an even more shitty life. So I don’t cancel.
It looks like the cab has turned around at last. Then I see the the cab leave the the highway, again, nowhere near me on the opposite side of the road. And I realize that there are hotels along that strip. And the penny drops. That driver must have picked up a random passenger (after accepting my pick up) and was dropping someone off ( making a bit of money on the side) and them making his way to me bullshitting me all the way. Now I can’t be 100% sure of this but, well, I am fed up regardless. I call him again. “Dude! What are you doing? Why aren’t you on Shk Zyd road?”
“Madame I am” he says.
“No you are not! What is going on? Why are you driving all over Dubai?” I complain at the driver.
I see is is back on Shk Zyd road and he promises me he is on the way.
A short time later he arrives full of excuses I do not want to hear. I say “Please just don’t. I really do not want to have a discussion just take me home." We continue the drive in silence. Three minutes from my villa he starts the patter. “So mam, where do you come from?” Are you kidding me? This guy want a "let’s get to know each other" conversation so I will tip him! After his nonsense in getting to me. An icy silence followed.
We arrive. I explain the route out of the complex. I do not thank him. And here comes the dazzling icing on the cake. He picks up his phone, opens the app and says “Look Madame I am giving you a five star rating.” My jaw drops. I get out of the cab saying “ SERIOUSLY?” slamming the door and stomping into the villa in a complete strop.
The driver get to rate me as a passenger? No, no, no! Something is wrong here. I am paying for a service and I get rated? In what weird world is it that I get social brownie points from a taxi service? This is outrageous. Who is serving who?
Next time I am in a cab maybe I should say “Show me yours before I show you mine”.
